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1. Drinking alone
There is having a drink in the privacy of your home and there is drinking alone. This might seem like a distinction without a difference, but the distinction is very real. If you have a glass of wine with dinner or sip a beer while watching television, relax—this does not necessarily qualify as drinking alone in any troubling sense. Quantity is a consideration, and an important one. If that glass of wine turns to, say, one bottle of wine, you or your loved one might be flirting with alcoholism. Likewise, with the beer; one can is not a problem, but when that case begins to feel a bit light as your stomach starts to feel full…well, it’s time to take inventory of your situation.
Ideally, most of your drinking will take place in the company of others, but that will not always be the case. But if, when having a beer on your own, you feel a powerful urge to drink as though celebrating something (anything), stop and for a moment and reflect on how frequently that feeling has materialized. The answer may reveal something of crucial importance.
2. Coping via alcohol
Stress, grief, and anxiety will inevitably manifest even for those living the most charmed lives. The various ways people go about dealing with these emotional burdens differ greatly, but for many it involves the help of alcohol. You may have experienced this firsthand. Perhaps you lost a parent or a lifelong friend. Perhaps you missed out on a promotion or a well-deserved raise. Perhaps you are feeling incessant financial or professional stress.
If, when confronted by any of these challenges, your first instinct was to seek sustained comfort in a shot glass or in a box of wine, this might be a sign of alcoholism. You needn’t be falling over yourself in outright drunkenness for that to be true. In fact, high-functioning alcoholism generally precludes as much. It could be that you wear a brave face while in meetings or with your family, then retreat into a bottle once the façade is no longer necessary. If that sounds at all like you or a loved one, it may be time to seek help.
3. A drink at every opportunity
This ranks as perhaps the most outward and clear indicator of high-functioning alcoholism. There is an old joke about “…drinking only on days that end in ‘Y’…” For many high-functioning alcoholics, the problem is one of drinking both during and in-between meals. It extends to drinking whenever the situation permits. Breakfast with a friend on Tuesday morning – How about a mimosa? Stopping by to pick up some tools from your brother-in-law – Why not also stay for a beer or two? Brief midday layover in Chicago – The bar will probably welcome my business at 11:38 on a weekday.
Eventually, the reasoning becomes a necessary step toward rationalizing your alcohol consumption. You rationalize internally or, if in the company of others, voice a weak explanation of some sort. “This business deal is kicking my butt,” or “I can’t believe it’s raining in June. I need a drink.” The reasons don’t matter, not really. They exist only to thinly rationalize drinking to the point of excess. When it reaches a certain point, such as outright fabrication of excuses to drink, the alarm bells should be detectable to all. But there are significant obstacles to addressing this problem.
For whatever reason, the tendency to drink at every turn is sometime regarded as a quirk, a charming characteristic. It is certainly nothing worth treating as a real threat to a person’s wellbeing. Furthermore, the social qualities necessary to gloss over the dependency tend to be effective rationalizing agents. Both the drinker and those privy to the drinking may find their concerns muted by the former’s ability to explain every afternoon gin-and-tonic or lunchtime shot.
5. Heightened tolerance
Alcohol can only be processed by the human body in limited quantities, but the body’s biochemistry is rather adaptable. People with a history of sustained alcohol intake are notably more resistant to drunkenness than are those who drink infrequently or in moderation. Composure can also be practiced to an extent. High-functioning alcoholics will almost always exhibit high levels of alcohol tolerance and can avoid appearing overtly drunk once the alcohol sets in. This is not a superhuman quality by any measure. It is a natural biological response to high-volume alcohol intake.
If you have noticed you never seem to “get drunk” and you remain seemingly unimpaired following two or three drinks, it’s possible your tolerance has been strengthening as your will to abstain from alcohol has been weakening. Recognizing as much is crucial where seeking treatment is concerned. None of this is to say that resistance to drunkenness is a definitive sign of alcoholism (high-functioning or otherwise). A healthy, athletic body might also be less prone to inebriation than an unhealthy counterpart, as metabolism and muscle mass contribute greatly to human biochemistry. Even so, a high-functioning alcoholic will generally have some awareness of their higher-than-average tolerance. Register that awareness responsibly, if it does apply to you.